Long time no sleep… Also a bit about nudes.

I’d love to tell you that I haven’t slept properly because I’ve been on a week long love tryst and haven’t left my bedroom. the latter part is true, I’ve barely left my bedroom, but that dear reader is because I have managed to get norovirus and what seems like the flu simultaneously, so it’s less “pull my hair and do me now” and more “hold my hair please I’m going to be sick” which isn’t nearly as fun. Mind you, whilst on the phone to the NHS helpline (Johnny’s idea, not mine, felt thoroughly stupid when they started asking me if I might have ebola- nope just food poisoning sorry to trouble you) the guy on the line goes “yes well vomiting does weaken the effects of the contraceptive pill so you’ll need to take extra precautions if you do anything like that in the next few days” …funnily enough I don’t really fancy it right now!

So in my bored, bedridden state I decided to look for a valentines day present for Johnny. Gifts for him throws up an array of “man gifts” for your average manly man, super hot chilli sauce FOR MEN, personalised pint glass FOR MEN, tool kit FOR MEN, engraved money clip (that’s a thing manly men need apparently, obviously for taking to strip clubs to pay for bitches because they’re manly men! Grrrrr! Testosterone!). However, if you take one letter out of for men it says “for me” so I soon gave up and purchased Johnny’s valentines day treats (plural, because I’m the best) on Ann Summers and left it at that. Because, to all extents and purposes, Johnny is not a manly man. He can grow a pretty mean beard but if you ask him what film he wants to watch he’ll probably say Frozen or Pitch Perfect. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him drink a pint of lager in my life, only cider or some weird bottled beer. And I’ve never seen anyone so excited about the prospect of my new body shop body butter. Plus he doesn’t like steak which I personally find an abomination. Mind you, he has his manly moments but my mother is inevitably reading so we’ll leave that one there… (sorry mum)

On the subject of manly men (tenuous link coming up) The Sun recently stopped publishing it’s page 3 girls for 3 days and then started again with a rather stunning blonde named Nicole (who is 22 and from Bournemouth, fascinating).

As a result the page 3 debate is back. Whilst I agree that maybe images like this shouldn’t be this easy for children to get hold of, the idea that it is unfair on the women in the pictures really baffles me. Judging from Nicole, 22 from Bournemouth’s expression I don’t think she’s being held at gun point and forced to take off her clothes, I don’t think even Murdoch is that much of a dick. The fact of the matter is these women get paid to do this, and gosh darn it good on them. Honestly, if someone wanted to pay me to take my clothes off (like lots of money, not like “‘ere love get your baps out and I’ll buy you a boneless banquet”) I damn well would. However, I imagine if I ended up on page 3 you’d probably only get half of me on there. Their bodies are an investment of their time and money, and so essentially are their business, just like anyone else who owns a business. It’s how they make money and that’s their choice not anyone else. Of course there is the argument that it objectifies women as a whole and teaches men to treat women as slabs of meat but does the media not do the same to men? I mean have you SEEN the M&S advert with David Gandy? Jeez, that is something beautiful. Here are a few snaps incase you haven’t seen it (or, if you have, for old times sake…mmm)

I really don’t think that women, or men, using what they’ve got and flaunting it can be considered objectifying. There used to be a time when women were shamed for showing their ankles (bummer for me and my ankles) and now we live in a time of “yaaay get your boobies out and put them everywhere!” and personally I think that’s great! 🙂